Coded

25 | he/him

BYF

You're welcome to follow me as you would like, but keep these points in mind:

1. I am against racism, xenophobia, homophobia, transphobia, colorism, sexism, ableism, islamophobia, etc., to the best of my ability

2. I support BLM, and defunding the police

3. I am not comfortable with the concept of a bi/pan/het lesbian

4. I am an adult, and will talk about adult experiences. While my twitter isn't ~nsfw~ per se, you will sometimes see nsfw text.

5. I will softblock minors (<18).

6. I am generally mentally in a good place, but I might talk about my history with mental illness, including hallucinations.

7. I am very opinionated about the fiction vs. reality debate - more on that here.

8. I occasionally will talk about my childhood trauma.

9. I am legitimately triggered by akuroku (Axel/Roxas from Kingdom Hearts) and appreciate it being tagged.

10. I am religious, but I don't agree with aspects that conflict with my beliefs above.

About

I'm Coded! I'm twenty-five and I love anime, games, books, movies...media in general, mainly. I also am passionate on my views, so please understand that I am someone who is:

WhiteNeurodivergentMentally IllDisabledChristianSapphicNon-binary
I have identified as non-binary on-and-off, but it's complicated due to some experiences I've had. I do not consider myself trans.

I prefer he/him or they/them - if you know me irl you can continue to call me she/her.

Interests

Some things I like:
1. Translation! I translate mainly Spanish and Japanese, but I'm learning many other languages, e.g. French and Portuguese.
2. Music - I'm a trained classical/jazz musician.
3. Insurance - yes, really. I'm a health/life insurance agent.
4. Voice acting - I am less involved with it now as a hobby, but I love learning about it as a craft.
4. Many many more things....I'm always reading, watching, playing, etc.

Fandoms

AI: The Somnium Filesef: A Tale of Memories.Final FantasyFire EmblemHigurashi no Naku Koro niKingdom HeartsMonsterPromareSamurai FlamencoShinsekai yoriThe iDOLM@STERThe World Ends with YouZero Escape: Nine Hours, Nine Persons, Nine Doors

Faves

Ships

Renju/PewterAoi/SakuraNiles/CorrinDedue/DimitriLeorio/KurapikaLea/IsaYu/YosukeMasayoshi/HidenoriJonathan/WalterSaki/MariaMaka/SoulFrederica/ShikiKorra/Asami

Fiction vs. Reality

This is a topic that I tend to talk about a bit, and I know people are sensitive about it. Here are the gist of my opinions:
1. I'm not comfortable with adults sexualizing minor characters.
2. I do believe that the sexualization of minor characters can affect minors' perception of themselves in reality.
3. Aged-up characters make me feel uncomfortable, but I do think it is different than blatant a/m content.
4. I don't think that a/m content, as long as entirely fictional, should be outlawed. I have conflicted feelings on this - mainly, I can't possibly see a pragmatic way to legislate it without contributing to discrimination, censorship, etc. I would like for this content to not exist, but I also don't want to have to expose vulnerable people (survivors coping for instance) to the police.
5. I believe that groomers will use whatever material they can to groom. A/m content might make it slightly easier, because it's more relatable to their goals, but abusive behavior is not limited to ships of abuse. *As an addition to this - I am very, very against grooming with fiction. I want to make that abundantly clear.
6. I don't believe that people who like abusive fictional content believe that that content is okay in real life. There are rare exceptions, of course.
7. I believe coping via abusive fiction is a real thing.
8. I believe that people shouldn't make sweeping statements of whether abusive fiction is healthy for coping or not. Not even mental health professionals. Therapy is extremely varied.
9. I believe that people who create abusive fiction have a moral obligation to warn about the content.
10. I really dislike being abusive/violent/etc. etc., even as a joke, to people who consume abusive content.
11. I dislike the word "antis" - it's not transparently describing the issue. It also can be extremely patronizing - if you call someone an "anti," it's like a catch-all card that invalidates their arguments.
12. Even though I don't like the terms "anti" and "anti-anti," I might use them as a shorthand due to character limits.
13. I dislike "fancop" as a term, but I especially dislike people comparing fandom to actual cops.
14. I HATE sweeping statements like "antis don't really care about survivors," because it implies that antis aren't survivors themselves.
15. I also don't like sweeping statements like "anti-antis hate survivors," because it ignores the very real connection between survivors and consuming abusive content.
16. I dislike sweeping statements calling "antis" homophobic - listen fellas we're all gay we just have different opinions
17. I don't like statements like e.g. "I think anti-antis are horrible people who should die, but not survivors! uwu." That puts people in a situation where they need to out themselves to be validated.

I do feel like it is important to have a bit more context as to why I have these opinions.

NOTE: CSA tw from this point on.

This part is embarrassing for me to write, but it is important.

I am a child trauma survivor, but I have a unique situation. When I was 3-11, I went through repeated medical treatment that dealt with the same...parts as with csa. I also am a cocsa survivor, but I have such a vague memory of it.

The most accurate description for me is "survivor of genitalia-related medical trauma during childhood and cocsa survivor." Understand that if I call myself a csa survivor, it is under these terms. I don't want to implicate the doctors that worked with me, but also understand that my mental health team has treated me as though I was molested as a child. It has profoundly affected my life and relationships, even if everyone did the best they could do to prevent that.

Because of this, I have coped with fiction myself. I relate to a lot of characters that went through csa, or general childhood medical trauma. I probably cope in more "acceptable" ways - mainly through rape/recovery and rape/revenge stories, but I still understand the power that fiction has. The reason I realized how my childhood had affected me was due to fiction.

The tl;dr of this page is basically this: I don't like fiction of abuse, but I also don't like people being abusive to those who consume it. I wish that people were more compassionate and sympathetic to survivors in these discussions.

home